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Catsey Veteran
 
Cats owned: DSH Cats
Join Date: May 2008
Location: USA
Posts: 1,882
01-03-2010, 07:10 PM   #1

To have or not have...


Hello
I hope this isn't too personal of a question but I was just curious...

Why did you decide to have or not have children?
______________________________________________
When we were first married, we kept getting asked
"So when are you going to have kids?"
Our "Never" response got met with odd stares.

We do have children, they just happen to be furry with four legs!

My husband & I have chosen not to have human children.
Just being a couple with our cats is enough for us
We were meant to take care of cats & we couldn't be happier

When I was young, I was not one of those girls who dreamed of having babies when I grew up. I always felt a close connection to cats. I knew I wouldn't have children since I was very young. Not everyone was meant for children.

My husband & I will live our life saving as many cats as we can
Our lives are solely devoted to our cats



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Phoenix's Avatar
Catsey Veteran
 
Cats owned: 2 cats black/white and one tabby
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Somewhere or maybe nowhere
Posts: 4,296
01-03-2010, 09:54 PM   #2

Re: To have or not have...


I'm not in a relationship, simple as that

(Even if I was I wouldn't want to have children)



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Elaine's Avatar
Catsey Veteran
 
Cats owned: 2 moggies
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Aberdeen, Scotland
Posts: 15,256
01-03-2010, 10:07 PM   #3

Re: To have or not have...


I hate kids, never liked them, never liked myself much as a kid either. Satans spawn, thats what they are



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yola's Avatar
Catsey Veteran
 
Cats owned: 1 Persian and one b/w moo-cat mog
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Reading, Berkshire, UK
Posts: 12,771
01-03-2010, 10:38 PM   #4

Re: To have or not have...


I was adamant for many, many years that I didn't want children. Then something clicked and I thought . . . 'why not'. Only it wasn't as simple as that. Nothing happened. Finally after fertility treatment (not IVF), I did conceive only for it to be an ectopic pregnancy I was told the likelihood of children was next to zero after all the ops and messing about.

It left me stuggling to look at women pushing prams . . . I really found it difficult. But then, well, it just happened! Twice

We're probably older than we should be with small children and it IS a struggle to keep up with them, but they are my sanity and where all my love is focused.

I still obviously love my cats to bits but my attachment to them has become a lot less obsessive - I really did treat them like surrogate babies; they were filling an emotional void in me.



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dandysmom's Avatar
Catsey Veteran
 
Cats owned: Leia: blue torbie
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Washington, DC, USA
Posts: 31,378
01-03-2010, 10:47 PM   #5

Re: To have or not have...


Sorry, was editing post and it accidentally got posted...:blush:



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calismum's Avatar
Catsey Veteran
 
Cats owned: Two Tabby Girls
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Scotland, UK
Posts: 5,052
01-03-2010, 10:51 PM   #6

Re: To have or not have...


Loads of reasons. 1st marriage was a disaster from around end of 1st year so was not going to bring children to that.

Next relationship OH had a vasectomy and we discussed reversal, options etc but unfortunately he died before we made a final decision.

I now have two adult step children and have probably missed the boat age wise now. But my OH and I are real soulmates.

However, I have never really felt the omg I must have a child, nor do I feel I am missing out on some essential part of life.

I have two wonderful young nieces who I can send home any time I've had enough and like DM I feel I'd be a bit of a 'victorian' parent'



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dandysmom's Avatar
Catsey Veteran
 
Cats owned: Leia: blue torbie
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Washington, DC, USA
Posts: 31,378
01-03-2010, 10:52 PM   #7

Re: To have or not have...


I too knew from an early age that marriage and children wasn't for me. I'm not used to being around them, I would have been a terrible disciplinarian, and the thought of the terrible twos and the rebellious teen years that I've seen in friends kids reassured me that it was the right decision for me. Not everyone is cut out to be a mother.

Good question; actually no one has ever asked me that!



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dandysmom's Avatar
Catsey Veteran
 
Cats owned: Leia: blue torbie
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Washington, DC, USA
Posts: 31,378
01-03-2010, 10:53 PM   #8

Re: To have or not have...


Quote:
Originally Posted by Elaine
I hate kids, never liked them, never liked myself much as a kid either. Satans spawn, thats what they are
That's squirrels, Elaine!!



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calismum's Avatar
Catsey Veteran
 
Cats owned: Two Tabby Girls
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Scotland, UK
Posts: 5,052
01-03-2010, 10:55 PM   #9

Re: To have or not have...


Quote:
Originally Posted by dandysmom
That's squirrels, Elaine!!




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Catsey Veteran
 
Cats owned: DSH Cats
Join Date: May 2008
Location: USA
Posts: 1,882
03-03-2010, 02:36 PM   #10

Re: To have or not have...


Thank you to those who responded to this thread



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