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alexgirl73's Avatar
Catsey Veteran
 
Cats owned: 2 lovely boys and a beautiful girl
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Telford UK
Posts: 10,652
28-09-2012, 05:03 PM   #71

Re: Scoliosis


Elaine hunnie, I honestly wish I could be there to offer some sort of practical help First of all, you help loads of others out, time to call in a few favours. Don't be proud, ask anyone and everyone for some help!! Second of all, remind G, CALMLY, that whilst you appreciate he is in pain, you are making yourself ill to make things easier for him. If you can't speak about it without shouting, try writing it down. And thirdly, if it all gets too much, go!! Go to a friends, a relatives, the beach for a walk, anywhere you can have an hour to yourself where you can take some deep breaths. Sending lots of ((hugs)) xx



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Shelley123's Avatar
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Cats owned: NA
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Preston UK
Posts: 6,675
28-09-2012, 07:11 PM   #72

Re: Scoliosis


Elaine, sorry you are feeling like this i can quite understand it. You must be at you're wits end.
As Alex says, is there anyone you can call on for help ?



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Elaine's Avatar
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Cats owned: 2 moggies
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Location: Aberdeen, Scotland
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28-09-2012, 07:21 PM   #73

Re: Scoliosis


No sadly, every one seems to have their own problems to deal with.
While your advice sounds fantastic Alex and I do apreciate it, trying to talk to G about anything other than himself has always been a bit of an issue. You know the kinda thing, you get in from work and say "what a day" to which the reply is always "You've had a bad day? Wait till I tell you about the day I've had" and then proceeds to talk over you for the next half hour.
When i HAVE TRIED TO SAY ANYTHING LATELY i JUST GET A FOUL MOUTHED TORRID OF ABUSE.
I cannt talk to friends about it on the phone coz this is a small flat and he can hear. Tried talking to my mum who just said "chin up"



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angieh's Avatar
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Cats owned: Magnificent moggies
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Hampshire, UK
Posts: 21,718
28-09-2012, 07:39 PM   #74

Re: Scoliosis


Sounds to me as if you need someone professional who is not a friend/family member then. What about Samaritans? They may be able to offer practical advice and point you in the direction of proper help.



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alexgirl73's Avatar
Catsey Veteran
 
Cats owned: 2 lovely boys and a beautiful girl
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Telford UK
Posts: 10,652
28-09-2012, 08:30 PM   #75

Re: Scoliosis


I agree with angie Elaine, if you can't talk to anyone, go to a phonebox and call samaritans. Or if you are at work, call me! I'll listen to you rant and rave all you like But you need to do something or you are gonna blow and it wont be pretty!!



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Liz Liz is offline
Catsey Senior
 
Cats owned: 36 Moggies and 1 Neurotic ragdoll
Join Date: May 2006
Location: aaberdeenshire
Posts: 380
30-09-2012, 01:46 PM   #76

Re: Scoliosis


Robin is away all week and can offer you B & B hell box up the kits and bring them to, can offer a total mad house with a glass of wine and can get a cheesecake

Failing that come next weekend and we can put the worlds to right I ma home from work at roughly 6pm and need to sort out the troops and pill and inject them but have the time it you need to bend someones ear and the boys Sky, Sunny and Minstral can play ball with Rayne

Also G will be entitled to benefits help inckuding Council tax and can help you out with that to



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Elaine's Avatar
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Cats owned: 2 moggies
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Aberdeen, Scotland
Posts: 15,256
30-09-2012, 03:02 PM   #77

Re: Scoliosis


Thanx every one. Have bent several ears over the week end which has helped alot, just getting stuff off my chest and being able to be honest about my feeling without feeling guilty, eased some of the pressure I think.
All advice has been well noted and I am very thankful for all of my friends both on the internet and in real life too.



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yola's Avatar
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Cats owned: 1 Persian and one b/w moo-cat mog
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Reading, Berkshire, UK
Posts: 12,766
01-10-2012, 09:03 AM   #78

Re: Scoliosis


Oh Elaine. Your comment about having your bad day/illness/tiredness 'hijacked' rang so, so true. I feel awful for you . . . I've stopped any kind of conversation about how I feel and what I think because it's just not worth it.

I can also sympathise fully about the sensation of being totally overwhelmed. I'm still immersed in it and sometimes it can take a long time before things straighten themselves out (no pun intended there - poor G)

I'm pleased that you've managed to get some of this out into the open, I hope too that you can appreciate the importance of thinking about yourself - even if it's for a little while, because we all matter.

Please know that I'm thinking about you . . . and like the others, if I were closer I'd be making an offer of my spare room for a few days of 'you time'.



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Elaine's Avatar
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Cats owned: 2 moggies
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Location: Aberdeen, Scotland
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01-10-2012, 06:40 PM   #79

Re: Scoliosis


Aww Yola, you made me cry again but thankyou so much for your lovely words and thoughts.

Thankyou every one.

The reality is that on the outside I am holding it together but other than that I am a bloody depressing wreck right now, almost bi-polar if that makes any sense at all.



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Elaine's Avatar
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Cats owned: 2 moggies
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Aberdeen, Scotland
Posts: 15,256
16-10-2012, 08:07 PM   #80

Re: Scoliosis


Well Graham went to see the surgeons today who have said that he needs an operation on his back to remove a damaged/crushed disc and to shave a bit off of his spine. So he's now on the waiting list for an op'.



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