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Beauty: Diary of Goodbye
I've written this as though I wrote it from scratch at the time (most of it I did but I've added some bits in from memory). Some of the stuff was posted on this forum at the time but some wasn't.
Hope it doesn't upset anyone too much - I've put the dates in bold and split it into sections to try to avoid really upsetting someone. I'm going to see if I can post a couple of pictures of her now.
About Beauty: Beauty was timid elderly shorthair girl, we think she was about 14 or 15 when she died. She was scared of most people, men in particular and she was scared of other cats. She used to get quite worried about strangers, so she'd disappear off and hide in the garden or in the garage. The other favourite place she had for hiding was behind the settee in the sitting room.
Part 1 – Beauty Arrives
12th August 2007
We adopted Beauty from our local rescue today and brought her home. She was a bit nervous and hid away behind the settee as soon as we let her out of her cage. We chose her because she was the oldest there and so she was being overlooked by everyone due to it being kitten season.
18th October 2007
Today when she was eating I heard her grunting like a pig and this afternoon I heard her groaning quietly.
19th October 2007
Beauty was sniffing round the bag and somehow ripped it open and was trying to get the sandwich chicken out. She got it though because I gave her some of it. She had 3 slices and while she was eating the last slice I hid the rest where she can't get it (or smell it) to give to her later.
Part 2 – Beauty’s Winter With Us
5th December 2007
Before last night none of us thought Beauty could meow! Half 11 last night I was woken up by her bellowing up the stairs (probably saying it's too quiet now mummy!)
18th December 2007
Beauty started squeaking like a mouse when I was stroking her.
28th December 2007
Beauty actually played today! Usually she’s quite scared of toys.
3rd January 2008
She went outside this morning only to come straight back in when she discovered
1) it was cold
and 2) it was very snowy. She probably thought the snow was invading her territory (judging by the way she glared at the snow)
4th January 2008
She's been really jumpy today and running from practically everything that moved! I think she's still a bit unnerved about the fact there was SNOW invading her territory yesterday.
Part 3 – Healthy Beauty
6th January 2008
I was changing the bedcovers today, Beauty came in to say hello, saw the bedcovers swooshing around and that was it! She disappeared faster than you could say Beauty, what's wrong? She's evidently scared of swooshy things.
10th January 2008
Twice last night and once today I have heard Beauty meowing! (it was her squeaky meow not her proper meow). She's got more of a squeak than a meow.
16th January 2008
Recently I have noticed she has really had to peer at the food in her bowl and rely on her sense of smell a lot more. I tested her eyesight and for her right eye she didn't respond at all. When I tested her left eye she tried to turn her head away.
18th January 2008
Beauty's been growling at me tonight (I think it was growling, it might have been grumbling) I started stroking her and she growled/grumbled.
19th January 2008
Beauty's back to her usual purry rub around anything self now. I had been woken up this morning by a furry head butting me saying get up mummy it's breakfast time! She asked me for some tuna and hasn't growled at all today. I think she may have been saying its bed time and I don't want strokes. I want the light switching out so I can go to sleep! (Maybe anyway) Whatever it was she's back to her normal self today.
25th January 2008
Last night I woke up to hear a cross between a snore and a purr coming from Beauty. Last night was the first night she had been in my room for a few nights. (She probably only came up so she could sleep by the heater!)
11th February 2008
Today I'd just got back from work and let Beauty out into the garden. Beauty went and had a drink, the retreated to the other end of the garden. A blackbird landed near the bird bath, then stared at Beauty in a "don't you dare come near the bird bath" way. Beauty stared back in a "get lost" way (to put it politely). That was hilarious!
27th February 2008
We had an earthquake during the night. Beauty got rather frightened and hid away.
10th March 2008
Beauty went out today and started trying to catch the birds. She started stalking two of them; they flew off, one calling "Beware! There's a cat about!" She stood and watched the birds fly off, wagging her tail at them. There was another one in the tree in our garden, but Beauty can't climb trees any more so that one was safe.
18th March 2008
I took Beauty down the vets this morning to have her booster jab. The vet checked her for arthritis as well and she decided to shout at both of us when the vet did the check. When we got home she jumped out of her carrier and went to hide and hasn't come out since. Not that I can blame her though! She's got arthritis, and the vet said to give her cod liver oil because that will help. If it gets any worse he wants to give her an x ray. She came out late this evening (probably because she smelt her “tasties” - chicken slices I got them out to persuade her to come out from under the bed).
5th April 2008
Beauty's got a lot braver with the camera. Today I got a few pictures of her and she decided to stare at the camera in an interested way. I brought it down to her level so she could have a sniff and she decided to start bunting it! I think at first Beauty was scared of the camera because she wasn't sure what it was.
9th April 2008
My brother and I were washing up this evening and we suddenly heard a scrabbling at the door. I opened it in time to see Beauty going back down on to all fours and coming in, so I think it was Beauty trying to open the back door to come in.
9th May 2008
Got in from work today, turned round, hearing a rustling noise only to see Beauty with her nose very near a plastic bag and a bee crawling on the bag! One of the sting-y bees so I had to quickly go and get a glass and a bit of paper to catch the bee before Beauty decided to try to get it (and end up getting stung on the nose) Finally caught the bee and took it outside, only to have Beauty sulking with me because she wanted to sniff the bee but I thought the bee would sting her. When I got it in the glass it was starting to buzz and I didn't want to risk Beauty getting stung.
Part 4 – Beauty’s Health Starts To Deteriorate
27th June 2008
Beauty's appetite has plummeted. She's still eating, but very little. She's losing quite a bit of weight, it may be because of the prescription food (i.e. she doesn't like it so she barely eats it).
5th July 2008
Beauty’s appetite picked up again.
13th July 2008
Yesterday and this morning Beauty's appetite plummeted again, so until dinner I had to force feed her to get some food down her (otherwise it would have been 24 hours since she had anything) At dinnertime she started eating by herself again.
Last night I was going to sleep when Beauty decided she wanted to move from her end of the bed, came walking along the bed to her vacated end (the end I sleep) and decided she was going to have a sniff of my nose!
15th July 2008
Beauty seemed to be reluctant to bunt round things today (usually she bunts round anything she can get near) She's also been eating grass last night and being sick, and she's been drinking a lot less as well. She's still grooming and she's been out hunting (brought back a bird) but she's also been making more noise than she usually does. She's also intermittently been breathing slightly quicker than normal (could be the heat - it's quite hot round here!)
19th July 2008
Beauty decided today she was going to stay outside for most of today, despite the fact it was raining heavily this afternoon and she got drenched! She finally came in this evening (when it had stopped raining) the silly thing was she stayed out in the middle of the garden RIGHT where she was bound to get drenched!
25th July 2008
Beauty caught her very first shrew today.
28th July 2008
Last night Beauty was wriggling on the floor like a demented worm! I tried stroking her and she decided she was going to hit my hand with her paw (claws sheathed!)
31st July 2008
This afternoon Beauty had seen a fly crawling on the floor and was staring at the fly intently. Next thing I knew she was trying to get the fly with her paw (she was breathing quickly with excitement at seeing the fly)
9th August 2008
Beauty had a “disagreement” with one of the neighbour’s cat this morning. I came in from work to see Beauty with something in her eye, got a tissue and wiped her eye, only to find most of the liquid in her eye was moisture (tear drops). A little bit was blood though. I cleaned her eye again a few minutes ago and there's no blood now.
21st August 2008
Today Beauty was in the kitchen, under the table (a favourite hidey-hole where she can watch what we are doing without the danger of getting trodden on) and she started sniffing round where she'd just been sat as if she couldn't remember what she smelt like.
26th August 2008
A few minutes ago my brother and I heard Beauty yowling at something at the top of her voice! Been out, can't see what Beauty was yowling at but Beauty's scrammed!
27th August 2008
Beauty nearly had a fight with her boyfriend or his brother today! I heard Beauty yelling so went outside but couldn't see anything because I couldn't see through the fence. She's OK though, come back and doesn't appear to have suffered anything! She's acting like it never happened and there's no injuries! So I'm not worried about her.
1st September 2008
Beauty's taken to trying to see the invisible wardrobe mice at night!
She'll lie down facing the wardrobe, peering underneath as if she thinks there are four legged squeaky things underneath.
8th September 2008
Beauty seems to have a thing about wardrobes! It started with her staring underneath one of them at night, now she keeps climbing in to another wardrobe that we have.
11th September 2008
According to Beauty the washing machine is the fridge! It's nowhere near the fridge, but Beauty decided she wanted to have her treats out of it (they are stored in the fridge). We had to say to her "They are in here!" and open the fridge door for her!
Part 5 – Near The End
12th September 2008
I spoke to the vets yesterday and they need a urine sample from Beauty this month. We have got two options: The first option is to get some none clumping litter and get her to use her litter tray,
The second option is to drop Beauty in to the vets one morning and let them try to get a urine sample from Beauty in a litter tray there.
14th September 2008
Yesterday evening Beauty was REALLY sociable with my brother and grandma! Normally she'll tolerate them but won't make it obvious that she likes them! She went right over to them both for a bit of love, but today she's back to not wanting to have love from them? She's normally happy to have love from me but she's usually strictly a "one person cat" (and that "one person" is me)
20th September 2008
For most of today I didn't (and still don't!) know exactly where Beauty was! I know where she is now, but it really scared me! I thought she had been hurt or worse! We checked everywhere we could think of, no sign of her! I eventually came across her (she finally emerged this evening from a spot of the garden I know for a fact she wasn't in when we were looking for her - I looked there!) At least she's OK and indoors, none the worse for wear for the fright she gave us.
29th September 2008
Today Beauty's decided the only thing she'll eat today is tuna! Her dried food has been down all day, untouched, tried coaxing her with chicken, no luck! It's strange because usually she'll kill for a bit of chicken!
3rd October 2008
Beauty used her tray last night but the litter wasn't suitable. I've got some special litter from the vets and I've got two weeks to get a sample from her. The vet said to bring her in after the two weeks if she hasn't "performed".
5th October 2008
Last night Beauty left us a present in the bath (a smelly unwanted present). I'm not sure why she did it in the bath, I'm pretty sure it wasn't a case of oops - I - can't - get - to - my - litter - tray - in - time, I think it was a case of The-vet's-given-you-some-litter-to-put-in-my-litter-tray-and-I-don't-like-the-new-litter.
She's had a little accident before, that was a case of can't get to my litter tray in time, the vet didn't find any reason health wise why she should have had that accident, and she wasn't stressed at all.
14th October 2008
Beauty went out to rain bathe.
18th October 2008
I took Beauty into the vets, but the vet couldn't persuade Beauty to give a sample, Beauty threw up her breakfast twice on the way to the vets, did a number 2 on the way back (it's nearly the colour of fudge and is too runny to be normal). She's also been hiding, we can't pick her up because she starts trying to get down every time we pick her up, flinches away from us when we approach and she's hardly gone outside today. She's been sleeping a lot as well today, more than usual.
19th October 2008
Today she's hardly eaten anything, not gone out (apart for a quick drink out of the bird bath then needed help coming back in) and been generally not right! She's been hiding for most of today, not sleeping in her usual spots, and generally been not right. In fact she no longer enjoys the things she used to.
21st October 2008
The vet thinks its constipation, prescribed her katalax (we don't think it is, she's had constipation before and she hasn't been acting like that! We didn't see the vet we usually see when we take Beauty in, he was a different vet) and for some reason she started being as sick as the proverbial dog. It was too late at night for us to phone the vet back, so we had to leave it and so far, Beauty's appetite has picked up a little, no vomiting as far as we know, she went outside a couple of times today and she's seemed a little brighter. She still won’t let us pick her up or stroke her for longer than a few seconds. It wasn't looking hopeful yesterday, she was really very poorly! When we took her to the vets the vet discovered another lump in her stomach/abdomen area. If it isn't constipation then God knows what it is because we don't! We don't think its Beauty being constipated because Beauty has been leaving rather large smelly presents in the bath, they look perfectly normal (apart from her accident in the carrier on the way home from the vets on Saturday)
22nd October 2008
Today (and later on last night) Beauty could tolerate being stroked, but she still seems to be in a lot of pain when picked up. She'll hunch up then try to get away from the "hurt" i.e. the pain that I'm putting her in by picking her up. I'm taking her in on Friday and hopefully our usual vet will be there. Out of all the vets I've seen with Beauty, he's probably the best one. Her appetite has picked up a bit yesterday, dropped a little today and so far she hasn't vomited at all.
24th October 2008
The vet has seen her now, and he's prescribed paraffin and said to keep her on her katalax until Monday. If she hasn't improved then I'm taking her in again on Monday and they are going to try something else. If there's still no improvement then they are going to admit her to the hospital and run some tests. They said it could be that it's a tumour (considering this is the second time this has happened - not Beauty being in pain but her constipation) so they want to try to find out what's wrong as soon as possible.
25th October 2008
To date today, Beauty's done two very silly things: Thing 1: Stuck all her food in her cat milk (which I'd put down for her to try to coax her to have something wet apart from water) Thing 2: Decided to use her water as a paddling pool.
Part 6 – Losing Beauty
27th October 2008
It's really bad news! The lump hasn't shifted so the vet thinks it's a tumour (or something sinister). A cat loving friend came with me to the vets. The options are surgery (not really an option because of Beauty's health conditions and it could potentially or there's a very good chance her kidneys could fail due to the surgery, also the tests it wouldn't be fair to put her through all that) or PTS, basically! I couldn't put her through the surgery, so the only other option is what I have said above. I've brought her home without the vet doing anything to her and we have decided it would be fairer to let her go between Wednesday and Saturday.
29th October 2008
I think the time to let her go is very close. Even though she normally loves anything spelt t-u-n-a today she just wouldn't eat it! Picked at her dried this morning and so far hasn't even had turkey or pork, both which she's been addicted to all week! Yesterday she scoffed the turkey I gave her and came back for two helpings of pork! Tried heating the tuna up but she's completely uninterested! I tried phoning the vets as soon as I got in from college but I couldn't get a response apart from an answer machine message saying it's closed. I've asked my grandma to phone up first thing tomorrow to make the appointment (I can't because I've got college all day) She's been lying down upstairs for most of today, when I came in and she heard me she prowled for about five minutes then went off to lie down again.
Part 7 – Goodbye Beauty, sleep well sugar pie
3rd November 2008
We had Beauty put to sleep this morning, because of all her health conditions. The vet came out at about half eleven this morning and said he thought we were doing the right thing letting her go before she suffered any more. We suspected that she had liver trouble as well but didn’t have her checked for it because there was no point, due to her being PTS today.
A loving history of her life and times with you, a lot of time and effort went into that and shows your love and caring for her and her little endearing quirks. RIP, Beauty, not forgotten,