Please humour my rambling, it is my way of coming to terms with things, and I normally get some warning about this and can start coming to terms with things before hand, but not this time - i have known for a long time that losing Ginger would be hard, but like most people, thought I would have some warning (he is the only one of mine to have gone naturally and with no sign of illness - his heart murmur had been checked recently and was fine), and that I would have time to accept it. Today was hard, I was on the verge of tears all day, and as I work in a small office, loads of people knew and were asking if I was OK, which made me worse. I have been able to look at pics of him though, as while it is a shock, I know that I gave him a chance, and had 4 wonderful years in return, I was just hoping for 4 more. But, he was a quiet, unassuming cat who was never any bother, the only major health issues we had was 3 dentals and a fatty lump removal, and was even teh same in death, we didn't have to go through a long drawn out illness with me wondering how far to let things go for him, he chose a nice spot at the end of the street (although not where he would normally choose) and went quietly, typical Ginger. His brother is still alive, so he really was the unlucky one. I am going to get a tattoo of a pawprint done in his memory for my birthday - my sis thinks i should have his name or initial under, but then I would have to do it for all the others, and I somehow think I would end up with a lot of initials if I went down that route (6 so far and I still have 2 permanent cats - and am only 24!!), so I will stick with the pawprint, and while I know it is in his memory, it is a universal thing really.