I'm looking for ways to get my boyfriend off my back about declawing Charlotte

[JuliePup]

Hi everybody. I'm extremely new here, just joined today. I'll give you the short version of my dilema...my boyfriend Matt and I just got Charlotte, a 2 and a half month old female kitten. She's just a princess, and she doesn't scratch anything but her scratch post. Matt is somewhat OCD about keeping the furniture perfect :roll: I'm constantly reminding him that if we have animals, nothing will be quote "perfect" all the time, and for the animals we have, all of our furniture is in perfectly good shape. He's quite worried about her scratching up the couch and everything else when she gets older. He's on my back about getting her declawed, which I am VEHEMENT about never doing to her. I refuse to take her claws away from her, especially just for the furniture's continued perfection....I hate when people do that, and I'll never be one of them.
I've tried explaining to him that it's not a 'simple' procedure, that there are plenty of negative consequences possible, and that there are reasons why cats were given claws. He still doens't get it :mad: Well I found the website www.softpaws.com today, and it shows the truth (diagrams included) behind declawing your cat. i'll show him that today to try to get it into his head lol. I was also wondering....I'm looking for options besides declawing that will be effective and humane that will convince him to get declawing out of his head.
I guess my question is....Just in case she does start scratching the furniture in the future, what would you guys recommend? I notice a lot of you have their nails trimmed...how does that work for you guys? it seems like that would be the best option, being easy, effective, and very humane, along with training her to use her scratch post as much as possible. Have any of you ever tried these things called ''soft paws''? they are those caps you glue onto their front claws. I'm not sure what to make of them, I'm a little wierded out by them. I was just after some of your oppinions on this whole subject, I guess. I really appreciate all of your help, and I thank you for your time!!! any advise would be great!!!

~Julie

[angieh]

Sorry Julie - I know it's not you who is advocating declawing little Charlotte but I don't even want to go there. It's illegal I believe in U.K.

[Shelley123]

Hello Julie, welcome to the forum.
You are so right not to have Charlotte declawed, it's barbaric.
It's not a procedure that is done in the UK , thank goodness.
A scratch post is good and it's a good sign if shes using it now. Our cats sharpened their claws outside on fences, tree trunks etc. We have never found it neccesary to have our cats claws trimmed but then again our furniture sure has seen better days,lol.
That being said, maybe claw trimming would be an option if she did start on the furniture.

[dandysmom]

Declawing is barbaric; most sensible countries have outlawed it, and many vets refuse to do it. But I'm preaching to the choir, I see; you don't need convincing, but the OH. If he can watch that video and till want it, I despair ..

Claw clipping is easy if you start them young they take it as a part of life. Just get a good pair of cat clippers, not people ones. Does she use her scratching post now? If not, try rubbing a bit of catnip on it; may encourage her. I've neither used the attachable artificial claws nor known anyone who has, so no opinion there .... although it seems like a lot of bother. Will she have access to outdoors? She may do a lot of her claw sharpening there, hopefully.

Good luck!!

[lynz85]

i also dont want to go into the declawing subject too much, i do think it is cruel and unecessary. i have a 9 month old kitten, i got him at 9 weeks old and he has treated my furniture very well. i have a leather couch, he's only left a few claw marks from hanging on the back :roll:, he never uses his claws when jumping up. there has been a couple of times when hes tries to pluke up the carpet to get into a room but that kind of behaviour can be easily discouraged. if your kitten is using her scratch post, some regular claw trimming should be fine.

[Hreow]

Start by getting her used to having her claws trimmed. Just do one or two at a time and only take off the very end. With a bit of luck, this might be all you would need to do. I know some people swear by the soft paws - maybe that would be a decent compromise if it becomes absolutely necessary.

Good luck with your continued training of the boyfriend. :)

[dandysmom]

Yes, be careful not to clip too far down; you can see the pink vein. If accidentally cut, it bleeds. Mine got used to claw clipping as kittens, so it was no big deal.

[Velvet]

Ive never clipped Tim or Amber's claws, are you meant to do it??

[Tink]

Tell him it's basically amputation of her fingers and she is going to have mental issues as well as physical pain and having to relearn how to walk. It'd be like cutting off his toes. If he still insists, kick boyfriend to the curb. Or maybe he can put his perfect furniture into storage facility.

[Hreow]

Ive never clipped Tim or Amber's claws, are you meant to do it??

You don't have to if your cat has ample opportunity to scratch properly - your scratchpost should do nicely :) - and they are physically capable of doing so.
However, if you do take just the very tip off they will do less damage if they do by accident catch on something or the cat extends their claws to catch themselves falling (or at the vet's when they are feeling scared or irritated). Also, if you get your cats used to having their claws clipped, you have an easier life if they damage a claw and you need to trim it so it doesn't catch on everything (as they know the clipping bit already) and they'll be used to you handling their paws and claws so that the "soft paws" will be doable if you need to go down that route.

[Kim]

Plese don't give in to your boyfriend, it is cruel and barbaric and thanks goodness illegal here. I honestly think it would be fairer to re-home your cat than give in to this. Sorry I know you are against it and I wish you luck. Oh and welcome to catsey! :) x

[Misspurrfect]

I have two indoor cats who both use their scratching post to keep their claws OK. Yes, my furniture has been slightly damaged, mainly from when they were kittens, but I accepted the fact when I got the cats, damage was something that was bound to happen. I get so much pleasure and love from them both that I think the trade off is worth it :D

Perhaps your boyfriend didn't have all the facts when he was so insistent about the declawing and hopefully will now have been convinced how horrible it would be

[Velvet]

You don't have to if your cat has ample opportunity to scratch properly - your scratchpost should do nicely :) - and they are physically capable of doing so.
However, if you do take just the very tip off they will do less damage if they do by accident catch on something or the cat extends their claws to catch themselves falling (or at the vet's when they are feeling scared or irritated). Also, if you get your cats used to having their claws clipped, you have an easier life if they damage a claw and you need to trim it so it doesn't catch on everything (as they know the clipping bit already) and they'll be used to you handling their paws and claws so that the "soft paws" will be doable if you need to go down that route.

Ah well they do use their scratching posts, two downstairs plus one upstairs plus they are fond of the side of my chair:D :D - I just gently lift the paws away.

Do trim the dogs nails periodically so always do gently stroke the cats feet and lift them - habit with doing same with the dogs. They seem to quite like it;) Clipping nails might be another thing;)

[pamela81]

i agree with everyone else on the topic of declawing. They have their claws for a reason. I take my 2 to the groomers in p@h to get theri nails trimmed every so often. They both use the scratch post but i find that their nails still get long as they dont have access to the outdoors. In regards to furniture, my boy is partial to clawing 1 particular bit of the couch but when told no, he comes away from it.

[paulinef2]

Tiger uses his scratching post, he doesn't claw the furniture although I do have a few wee claw marks on the couch but these are accidental. I think you should stand firm on the declawing issue, it's banned in the UK for a reason. Personally I'd keep the cat and change the boyfriend :D

[Elaine]

If your b/f is prepared to have his fingers amputated from the knuckle first, then go for it. If he doesnt want an animal that scratches then he should consider a goldfish as a pet.

[angieh]

Tiger uses his scratching post, he doesn't claw the furniture although I do have a few wee claw marks on the couch but these are accidental. I think you should stand firm on the declawing issue, it's banned in the UK for a reason. Personally I'd keep the cat and change the boyfriend :D

I'd vote that way too!

[dandysmom]

I'd vote that way too!

I agree .... sounds as if he is more interested in the furniture than having respect for life and the pain he'd be inflicting.....

[babycakes]

I woiuldnt even be discussing it with him, its a plain and simple no and he is being abusive by getting it done, therefore I wouldnt even be in a relationship with someone who had these views. Plain and simple

[HappyKatz]

Well if you give a cat lots of places to scratch, they won't be interested in your furniture. Our furniture hasn't been touched due to all of the cat natured stuff they have. And if they do touch the furniture, which is usually just to stretch, just squirt them with a water bottle & a cat will know that is not a place to scratch. Then in a calm manner show them their scratching post. You could try softpaws or getting them clipped by a vet or try yourself...Its all about compromise when you have a cat.

Declawing hurts a cat in so many ways...This is not something you can give into. A cats claws are very important, taking them away would be like taking away part of their life. Just shouldn't be done...

Hope you can talk him out of getting Charlotte declawed. Take Care & Enjoy your day :cat27

[JuliePup]

Well I have good news....I finally got it through his head about what exactly declawing entails. I had tried explaining this to him before (many times :roll: ), but I think that he just didn't want to listen, so he never tried to understand declawing fully. I even clipped the tippy tips of her nails, just where they started to get sharp, and she did very well during the whole thing...she's so patient and sweet :) I had Matt hold her while I clipped her claws, and so he saw how quick and easy it was...it took about 3 minutes...I have dogs, so I am used to clipping animal nails anyway. Then he felt the tips of her nails, and said 'oh, well that really did help didnt it??? wow i didnt think it would be that simple' I couldnt resist shooting him an eye roll or three. It's so irritating when people don't listen to sound reasoning. grrrr. It must be me, am I totally stupid or something??? lol geeze

She is also using her scratch post like mad, and she loves catnip, so she definitely took to the scratch post after I rubbed some catnip on it :shock: Thank you all so much for your advise and support. Believe me, I asked him many times, ''why did you want to get a cat if you knew that they came with claws???" but it seems as if that "issue" has been solved, thank goodness.....there was no way in hell that I was even going to consider taking her claws from her....over my dead body, I tell you.....

[dandysmom]

Thank you so much for the update! So he finally saw reason, thank God. Claw clipping is easy when you start them young, I'm so happy to hear it's worked out well for you and Charlotte.

[Elaine]

Good news indeed.:D

[angieh]

So very glad - perhaps you can keep bf and cat now!!! Great when the truth of a situation finally clicks.... well done both of you. Good luck to you and to Charlotte. A photo of Charlotte with her lovely paws and claws intact would be much appreciated!

[dandysmom]

Second the pic request! :D

[Kim]

Good news, thanks for keeping us updated. :)

[Squirrel]

Phew - that's good news. Horrible when ignorance leads to so much pain and upset for an otherwise loved pet.

[yola]

Good news all round :D

Look forward to pics of Charlotte and learning a bit more about her - she sounds adorable.

[HappyKatz]

Well that is wonderful news! :-D
Hope to hear all about your beautiful cat Charlotte & see photos of her too someday :cat27

[JuliePup]

Thank you guys so much for your support....I thought I was going a bit mad for a second there :lol: Matt means well, but it's funny....He's an animal person at heart, and since he's been with me, he's begun to let himself act like one more and more (if he really wasn't an animal lover, he wouldn't be able to stand living in our house hehehee). But he comes from a family that really isn't into animals as long term family members....they're very nice people, but they're the type of people that have gotten puppies, kept them for a few months, and then gave them away when they started jumping on the kids or got ''too difficult to handle'' or whatever :evil: Definitely not my mindset, that's for sure. He doesn't share that mindset either (I couldn't be with him if he did), but he still kind of fights the fact that he thinks more like an animal person than a non-animal person because of the way he was raised, and so he gets stupid, uninformed ideas in his head, like the whole declawing nonsense. At one point, I had to say to him something along the lines of: "Look, I don't know why you keep bringing the declawing thing up, because it's pointless, and it's never ever EVER going to happen, period. If you didn't want claws on your furniture, we shouldn't have gotten a cat. But we have her now, and she is the sweetest, most loving little thing in the world, and at this point, I'm not going to rehome her since she's clearly become very bonded with us. It wouldn't be fair to her. So that leaves you with 2 options: 1) You can listen to my alternatives to declawing and take me seriously for a change, and we can do what it takes to make a comprimise, like clipping her nails, or 2) You can take your perfect furniture and move somewhere else with it if you find that it's that important to you, because our furniture is replaceable, our pets are not, and I'm putting my foot down about this, and the discussion is closed. If you don't like it, that's not my problem. End of story." And viola, he zipped his lid for five seconds and listened to what I had to say, we clipped her nails, and this whole thing has worked itself out wonderfully. Suprise, suprise. :roll: Plus, Charlotte got a little bit of early nail clipping training in. I just don't know why it takes him so dang long to listen to me and to trust that I do know what I'm talking about sometimes lol. sigh....But this is why I happily take care of all the animal related things in the house. Sorry.....end of rant lol :oops:

Charlotte is the sweetest kitten I've ever met...she follows me around everywhere and always falls asleep on my lap. She sleeps with me, and I wake up at night to her staring into my face, purring lol....that kind of freaks me out, but it's still very cute hehehee. She's already started bossing my four dogs around; it's nice to have some help keeping them in line!!! lol :-D I gave her her first bath yesterday afternoon, and while she didn't really care for it and she cried almost the whole time, she didn't fight me, and she came right up to me afterwards and layed on my lap. I was afraid that she'd be mad for a day or two lol. We are constantly laughing at her little antics, and she's always using the house as a race track!!! It's hilarious! Let's just say that it didn't take me long to fall in love with the little fuzz ball :lol:

Well, I only have one postable picture of her right now....My camera freaked out and died, and so the only way that I can take any pictures is on my cell phone, and I need to get a cable so I can upload them onto the computer. I"ll probably get one this weekend. So thank you all so so much for your help, advise, and understanding....it isn't always easy being the biggest animal person in the house lol. I'm so happy that I found this forum!!!! Here's the lovely Charlotte:

http://images.craigslist.org/3n63kf3pc5O15Z15U4b54af67d471a1591263.jpg


Have an awesome day everybody, two legged and four legged!!!!! ~Julie

[Mags]

Hi Julie, I've posted your pic of your beautiful Charlotte here for everyone to see.

She is a little stunner!:D

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v205/Mags40/Catsey%20cats/Charlotte.jpg

[dandysmom]

Awwww! Just ...... awwww.

[HappyKatz]

A big Awwwwww from me too! Charlotte is an adorable girl :)
That pretty face of hers can sure make anyone smile :cat27

[angieh]

What a precious little poppet .......... another AWWWWW from me!

So glad your b/f has decided to let his animal caring side come out!

[Moli]

She is simply gorgeous!

[JuliePup]

Thank you for the picture post, Mags!!! I was having the most trouble with posting it lol. Yeah I definitely need to get some more pictures up. Thank you everybody for your comments....she is definitely is an awwwww moment all the time lol! I can't help but to smile every time I see her look up at me with that wee little face!!! :lol: She's just perfect!!!

[Shelley123]

Brilliant news Julie, and Charlotte is just lovely.
It's very difficult when people have differing opinions like you and your B/F.
You did well to stay strong and he's done well to accept you opinion.
You have saved Charlotte from a dreadfull thing.

[babycakes]

Well done Julie, proud of you

[Phoenix]

Awww she's gorgeous :smt007 Glad you managed to get your boyfriend to see sense :D

[yola]

What a little doll-face! So very pleased her little toes get to remain intact.

[niki71uk]

Tell him it's basically amputation of her fingers and she is going to have mental issues as well as physical pain and having to relearn how to walk. It'd be like cutting off his toes. If he still insists, kick boyfriend to the curb. Or maybe he can put his perfect furniture into storage facility.




that amputation u mentioned reminded me of the american animal cops thing i watch on sky



a guy had tied rubber bands round his then g/f's cats front paws,till they eventually dropped off :shock:

fortuately or unfortunately the cat lived,it seemed to get around quite well considering,and was still very friendly:roll:

[dandysmom]

OMG, how sick! :shock:

[Squirrel]

what a wee cutie! :)

As to the rubber bands... Just YUK!!!

[angieh]

That's horrible niki - poor cat. I hope those animal cops arrested anyone involved in such cruelty.

Mind you, isn't that how lamb's tails are "docked"?

[truthisouthere]

I agree with Tink's ferocity on this. There is no beating around the bush as we say in the UK on this issue, cats are born with claws for several reasons, these being:

1) Claws aid grip when walking, cutting off that part of a cat's digit would be akin to cutting off some of our feet, yes I did say feet! If you liken a cat's natural climbing instinct to our natural instinct to walk each and every part of a cat's foot is finely tuned to aid balance and grip while climbing.

2) Claws are vital in getting a cat away from danger, fast. A cat has more chance of getting run over by a car when it can't grip the road surface than a cat that has all it's armour intact. Also a cat has less chance of getting away from other predators when being chased. You don't live near a road or your cat doesn't go out you say? If anything happened and that cat had to be rehomed it will be facing a whole new set of dangers.

Your OH sounds like a practical guy, so give him these practical truths.

Also, and this is only personal opinion, but if my OH tried to force animal cruelty on to my cat or any other animal for that matter I wouldn't give him the time of day.

..The mark of a person is shown by how they treat their fellow companions.

Just updated myself on all these posts I'm glad your OH saw the light! Look at your beautiful girl, how could he even think....