Memorial Locket?

[JBalways2000]

I hope i am putting this thread in the right section as im not sure where is appropriate.

Some of you will know that we lost our Raven on monday:cry: :cry: :cry: I have been talking alot about him and my feelings in my other thread so i will leave that out of this one:cry:

I basically would love to get a special locket, one that could hold a photo of Raven on one side, and a little bit of his fur on the other. Id love to get it plain so i could have it engraved, but would settle for another type if this wasnt possible. I know many of you will have lost your babies here:cry: or even just wanted to keep your kitties close to you, so thought some of you may have something similiar to what im after or maybe know where i could get something like this?

I have searched online and found somewhere in Australia that does a few lovely ones, but obviously would be worried about ordering from somewhere so far away and having to send his fur there to be put in it(as they water proof it) incase it got lost. I also looked at a plain white gold heart locket in argos, but because it is just a normal locket im not sure if it would hold his fur very well.

I just need to keep a little piece of him close to me wherever i go. The only thing getting us through this is our boys and knowing that he is still here with us and living on in them:cry: but a locket would be a nice little tribute to my Soul Mate and offer me a little comfort.

[Mags]

That is a lovely thought JB......

There is a plain locket on Amazon......

http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B000RL3V0I/ref=nosim/?tag=hotukdeals-21

[Moli]

What a lovely idea.........

[dandysmom]

I like that idea too; have no idea where to get one of the type you need, Will do a Google later.

[pookyandjo]

nice thought JB... I lost my Tinky Winky just over a year ago... i had him cremated... and carry some of his ashes and a little of his fur in a screw top key chain designed specifically for pets ashes..its goes with me everywhere <3

[Aquatic]

That is really nice idea.
When Lily died I kept her collar which still has her fur on there. It makes me laugh thinking of the struggle we went through just to get that collar on her but after all that hassle she loved it.

[tabsie]

I lost Tabitha 2 weeks ago and I have just brought a plain silver locket from argos £34.99. It's quite big and plain silver. I'm going to put a picture one side and some fur on the other side. Mine is in the jewellers at the moment, as its plain I am getting her name and a few words engraved on it.

[tabsie]

cont.... might be the one you have already seen in argos though. I have got some stiff plastic and need to fix that across the fur somehow

[JBalways2000]

I lost Tabitha 2 weeks ago and I have just brought a plain silver locket from argos £34.99. It's quite big and plain silver. I'm going to put a picture one side and some fur on the other side. Mine is in the jewellers at the moment, as its plain I am getting her name and a few words engraved on it.

Im so sorry for your loss:cry: Its the worst pain i have ever felt and i wouldnt wish it on anyone.

You will have to let me know how you manage with getting the fur into a normal locket. the one i saw in argos was white gold rather then silver-i love silver jewellry but the reason i was looking at the white gold is because i didnt want to risk getting a silver one and for it to go off colour(i have lots of silver jewellry, have always preferred it to gold but have found this to be a problem sometimes). I never wear any jewellry anyway except for my engagement ring so i want to make sure its something extra special as i will never be taking it off.

I hope it comes back from the jewellers perfect with your inscription, this is something im really hoping to do too. I would like to have his name and maybe a little paw print or something.

Thankyou for all the other replies too and so sorry to all that have lost a loved furry family member:( Im glad you all liked the idea, as i said i just needed to find a way to keep him close to my heart at all times. i plan on getting a long chain for whatever i decide on so that it is always resting on my heart where it should be and where Raven always will be.

If anyone has any suggestions id appreciate them, and i shall let you all know when i have made my decision. My OH's mom actually rang from a jewellers today after my partner mentioning my idea to her last night and she was going to get me one to cheer me up bless her, but i explained that i just need to look around until i find the perfect one.

Just wish this wasnt the reason i was doing it:cry:

[tabsie]

I'm so sorry for your loss also, I know what you mean about the worst pain, I feel the same. Tabitha was also my soul mate. I will let you know how I get on with putting the fur into the locket, I will probably post a picture. I also want to wear the locket all the time, so I feel that Tabitha is always with me, so I understand that you want it to be the right one for you x

[dandysmom]

I wish I'd thought of keeping a bit of fur to to that before my babies were buried in the garden ,,,,,,,,,

[Moli]

Thanks for this thread, I would never have thought of a locket....

[JBalways2000]

I'm so sorry for your loss also, I know what you mean about the worst pain, I feel the same. Tabitha was also my soul mate. I will let you know how I get on with putting the fur into the locket, I will probably post a picture. I also want to wear the locket all the time, so I feel that Tabitha is always with me, so I understand that you want it to be the right one for you x

Thankyou, the pain is almost unbareable isnt it? i say almost only because we have the other kitties to pull us through this, i dont know what i ever done without all my boys. well actually i do and it was a living hell at times until they came into our lives, i have alot to thank Raven and the others for. I am sorry you are going through the same pain though :( Il look forward to seeing your piccie, do you know when you will be getting it back from the jewellers?

I think i may end up getting the locket from argos that i saw, i did really like it, my only concerns were if the fur would fit ok and if we would be able to put an inscription on it, but i guess i can always return it if i cant do either of those things. As i said i shall certainly update when i have made a decision or got something. I have so many ideas of things to do and get to remember him, like getting a canvas done of my favourite photo of him(my avatar) and i saw a wooden photo frame on ebay that is a memorial one and they put the name and then an inscription of your choice on the side of the photo, and i thought about getting the lyrics to a song that reminds us of him:( i just wish so bad that i wasnt having to do all these things for the reason i am. :cry: all i want is him back with us:cry: its so hard thinking that this time last week he was here with us and we were cuddling with him:cry: :cry:

[JBalways2000]

Thanks for this thread, I would never have thought of a locket....

No need for thanks, its a shame that so many of us need them:(

[Moli]

I can understand how you feel, losing 2 of mine last year really hurts,I will never stop missing them, but am learning to cope with it....and no matter how many times we go through it the hurt is always the same....

[tabsie]

I know, I have shed so many tears, I want her back so much, I cant believe that I will never play with her again or watch her having fun in the garden, she gave me so much happiness, I would'nt change a minute of the time we had together. I am the same as you searching for things to remember her by. I should get my locket back with engraving on on wednesday, so I will try to find a way to secure the fur in and hopefully take a picture next week. Hopefully the pain will ease for us both so we can look back on our memories with a smile x

[JBalways2000]

I've ordered a canvas of my fave photo of Raven this evening(my avatar). Its saying it will take a couple of weeks until it arrives, i just hope that its perfect when it does. Im hoping to get my locket soon too.

Did you get your locket back yet Tabsie? im hoping it came back just as you wanted it.

I hate that so many know what this pain feels like, but im also comforted in a way knowing we arent the only ones going through this. i keep going over so many things in my head, like should i have done things differently, was it my fault? :cry: the vet said no one would have done anything differently but you cant help torturing yourself with those thoughts. it just feels like our family is incomplete. I miss him so much:cry: I feel guilty for still not having wrote his obituary, but i havent been able to bring myself to do it yet, or to look properly through the hundreds of photos that we have of the cats. Ive promised myself i will do it on saturday-its my Dad's anniversary then so its already going to be a hard day, and il be collecting Raven's ashes that day too :cry: along with Rosalie's ashes-she is one of our mice who passed on just a few days before we lost Raven and we havent even had a chance to grieve for her properly:cry: Now one of our other mice is very poorly:cry: I absolutely love all animals, i connect more with animals then i do with most humans, but the worst thing ever is losing them :cry:

If we didnt have the other boys right now i just dont know what i would do. Hernie has became my shadow since Raven got his wings, and i am so glad of it because I feel lonely enough with Raven not around:cry: i feel so horrible saying that when i have three other gorgeous boys and lots of other little furry family members, but me and Raven had such a strong bond:cry:

I wasnt supposed to be using this thread for my feelings, i just cant help it, i feel so lost without him. I do know hes still here though, i can feel his spirit in each of the boys and i know if he wasnt still here i wouldnt have been as strong as i have these last couple of weeks. Even now he is helping me through the hardest time of my life:(

[dandysmom]

"I wasnt supposed to be using this thread for my feelings"

Oh JB, why do you say that, of course it's OK to discuss them; many many of us have been thru it and can share your sorrow. It does help in a way to know those reading understand. It did with me when Patches went.
Post as often as you feel the need to, please. (((hugs)))

[pookyandjo]

having been through this in the last 12 months i can say that it helped me immensely to be able to "vent" on here...and its not just immediately after the loss... there are anniversaries...birthdays... and other days that are hard for no other reason apart from the fact that your fur baby is gone

one of the problems of being a cat lover is that lots of people dont share your love of cats.... they dont understand what its like when you lose one... to those people... they are "just a cat" if you haven't heard them already you may hear things like... "dont worry... you can just get another one" or "why are you so upset... its not like it was your child"
things like this are hurtful and unfortunately can go with the territory of being owned by a cat..
Here we all love our cats as much (in some cases more than) our children if we have them...
We understand the level of grief that you are enduring because we've been there too.....I think its important to be able to have confidence that you wont ever be judged on your feelings by posting them on Catsey

[tabsie]

I agree, don't ever feel bad about using this thread or any other thread for your feelings, everyone understands. I do know exactly how you feel, I too am going through all the guilt (should I have done things differently, should I have noticed something sooner, did I let her go too soon) but I think this is a normal part of grieving. I too have two other cats, so don't feel bad about the bond you shared with Raven. The bond I had with Tabitha was very strong. I love my other cats but I don't mind saying that what I had with Tabitha was extra special. I did get my locket back on Wednesday, I chose a photo to go into it last night (lots of tears) I will try and take a picture of it over the weekend. I hope your canvas comes back okay, when you feel ready you will have to put some photos of Raven on catsey.

[Magpye]

to those people... they are "just a cat" if you haven't heard them already you may hear things like... "dont worry... you can just get another one" or "why are you so upset... its not like it was your child"
things like this are hurtful and unfortunately can go with the territory of being owned by a cat..

I'll never understand why people think it's okay to say such things. I'm certain they wouldn't say something similar to someone whose father, mother, sibling or child had just died. I've had friends ask me why I bothered 'wasting' my money putting my kitty through chemo treatment when I could have just 'bought a new one'. Of course to them, those extra 3 years I got with my baby were just money down the drain but to me it was 100% worth it even if the cancer did get her in the end. To many, animals seem to be indispensable things that can be interchanged and replaced when necessary which I think is really sad.

JBAlways, I would be really interested to see how your locket turns out and whether it can hold the fur. My cat was pts yesterday morning and I've been considering doing something similar to you with her fur. I'm so sorry for your loss too :( I know how you're feeling, it's so lonely without them around and it's so easy to torture yourself by wondering if they would still be here had you just done things differently :cry:

[JBalways2000]

You are all so kind, and trust me i know i can post about my feelings here, you are a wonderful group of people and you are helping me so much. I was just trying to keep my locket thread seperate from it, but just couldnt help it. I have been meaning to start a new thread to talk about Raven, but i just couldnt think of an appropriate title for it. I had been posting in the thread i made in the health section, but every time i did i was seeing the title of that(Raven has kidney failure) and it was upsetting me too much.

We have actually been very lucky with Raven because our families have been very understanding of our feelings, our Mom's especially. I think they have seen over the years how much our animals mean to us, especially the cats. I didnt realise until now how much we speak about the kitties without even realising it lol but our Mom's have been brilliant letting us talk their ears off on the phone about Raven and crying to them. They both told us seperately that they know the cats are like children to us and they understand our loss-i was a little suprised that they both understood that so much and it was definately a comfort not to have to explain it. It was especially shocking as neither of them are cat lovers or like animals very much-they would never hurt one, but they just dont feel that connection. Its good to know that even they realise how important the cats are to us though. a couple of family members have let us down over Raven and it is a bit upsetting, but most of our family have been there for us and talking with all of you means alot too, it really does.

My OH is just looking through the video camera now checking for Raven footage-we have barely ever used it and not touched it in a while so im happy to say that he has already found alot of video of Raven-apparently its mostly of Raven:oops: that must be my fault :oops: i watched a little clip of him the other day that we had got on the digital camera, it was of him high on catnip and it made me smile so much. Im so glad we were able to get so many photos and even bits of video of him, but i know even if we hadnt the most important thing is all the memories he has given us, each one of them perfect.

Tabsie im glad that you got your locket back, il be looking forward to seeing it :) Did the fur go into it ok if you dont mind me asking? I can completely understand how upsetting it must have been choosing the photo, but i hope that now it will also bring comfort to you x

Thankyou all again for the kind words, the comfort and the hugs, you are all brilliant and im so glad to be a part of this little community.

[JBalways2000]

I'll never understand why people think it's okay to say such things. I'm certain they wouldn't say something similar to someone whose father, mother, sibling or child had just died. I've had friends ask me why I bothered 'wasting' my money putting my kitty through chemo treatment when I could have just 'bought a new one'. Of course to them, those extra 3 years I got with my baby were just money down the drain but to me it was 100% worth it even if the cancer did get her in the end. To many, animals seem to be indispensable things that can be interchanged and replaced when necessary which I think is really sad.

JBAlways, I would be really interested to see how your locket turns out and whether it can hold the fur. My cat was pts yesterday morning and I've been considering doing something similar to you with her fur. I'm so sorry for your loss too :( I know how you're feeling, it's so lonely without them around and it's so easy to torture yourself by wondering if they would still be here had you just done things differently :cry:

I am so sorry for your loss :cry: I cant believe anyone would say such hurtful things to you. As you say it gave your baby years of her life that she wouldnt have had if it was not for you-you cant put a price on that but im sure your baby repaid you with all the love she had, thats what our kitties do isnt it? We dont even have to ask it of them, they give back tenfold of what they receive.

I think the problem with alot of people is that they just dont have that connection with animals so its easy for them to think in terms of "get another one, its cheaper". I used to think i was close to one of my sisters, and the last few months she has upset me a little anyway, but im sad to say that even though my Mom has spoke with her numerous times about Raven and how upset i am she hasnt even tried to contact me. I know she has never wanted animals, out of the three of us it was always me begging for pets growing up and she was never interested, but her own husband is a big cat lover and grew up with cats and still has a photo of his cat Whiskey on the photo shelf along side photos of their children, so it shows how much he cared about his old girl. i thought that would be enough for her to realise the pain i was going through as her husband only lost his cat a few years back and reached a grand age of 22 so he had her most of his life. I feel a little sad for him now wondering if she was ever there fully when he was going through his pain. he had moved out years before losing her, but he was an only child and still sees his parents nearly every day which meant he saw his cat alot even after moving out so it still would have been very painful for him.

You do just get the completely uncaring types aswell of course and we have encountered plenty of them, mostly over us keeping ratties. Im glad to say we havent had much problems over us keeping kitties-even our neighbours are animal lovers so we have been lucky the last few years even with that(one side of us have only lived there a couple of years and before that it was a family from hell).

I dream of a world where we can all live in harmony with animals and they are no longer seen as possessions, but rather the companions that they are to us. It could be much worse though, atleast there are plenty of people in the world that feel the way we all do.

[angieh]

((((HUGS)))) JB - wouldn't it be wonderful to live in a world where everyone and everything was in harmony? Nirvana, I suppose.

Don't worry about not writing Raven's obituary. My memorial to Merlin is still half finished. Throughout this year, I have returned to it several times and read through what's already there (mostly tributes paid by Catsey members). Each time it has choked me but I find now that I can cry and smile almost at the same time. The passage of time does dull the pain, but keeping those memories alive becomes easier because I found that I can talk about little things that Merlin used to do with my OH and we can smile about them. Unfortunately, when Merlin was a young chap in the 80s it was before digital cameras and I have very few photos of him as a kitten or a youngster and they are not all that good. I do envy you having video footage of Raven. Perhaps you will feel like posting some of that when you are ready.

I am glad that most of your family have been supportive. I found the best people when Merlin went were the staff at my veterinary surgery - they couldn't have been kinder or more caring.

[JBalways2000]

((((HUGS)))) JB - wouldn't it be wonderful to live in a world where everyone and everything was in harmony? Nirvana, I suppose.

Don't worry about not writing Raven's obituary. My memorial to Merlin is still half finished. Throughout this year, I have returned to it several times and read through what's already there (mostly tributes paid by Catsey members). Each time it has choked me but I find now that I can cry and smile almost at the same time. The passage of time does dull the pain, but keeping those memories alive becomes easier because I found that I can talk about little things that Merlin used to do with my OH and we can smile about them. Unfortunately, when Merlin was a young chap in the 80s it was before digital cameras and I have very few photos of him as a kitten or a youngster and they are not all that good. I do envy you having video footage of Raven. Perhaps you will feel like posting some of that when you are ready.

I am glad that most of your family have been supportive. I found the best people when Merlin went were the staff at my veterinary surgery - they couldn't have been kinder or more caring.

Thankyou and yes when i feel ready i will definately share some of the video we have found. i still havent watched any apart from the clip i mentioned, i may have a look tonight. I do know how you must feel about not having many photos from Merlin being a kitten-when we first started keeping ratties we didnt have a camera so we only have a few blurry ones of the guys that didnt live very long and it is sad, but the most important thing is the memories they have left us with. It sounds like your boy lived a very long happy life too:)

Its lovely that your vets were so good to you-ours were very kind too. We have had our ups and downs at our vets, mainly because im very over protective of our fur babies and have a tendancy to question the vets sometimes :oops: but i know i can trust them all with their lives and when you have companion animals there is nothing more important then having a vet you can trust.

My OH has just came back from the vets-he had to bring our little mousey girl but luckily the vet says she isnt as bad as she looks, though she does have a bad chest infection-its nice to get a bit of good news after the last couple of weeks. He collected the ashes while he was there and as soon as i took Raven's casket out of its box, AJ climbed into it :lol: Thats AJ-he always has to climb into a box or sit on a bit of paper, it doesnt matter how small it is, doesnt stop our big boy from trying! i thought it was very fitting and im greatful to him for putting a smile on my face during another sad moment. What would i do without my boys?:smt007

[angieh]

Yes, now what about some photos of your lovely comforting boys, JB?

[JBalways2000]

Yes, now what about some photos of your lovely comforting boys, JB?

:lol: your right, i will have to make a thread and i will put some piccies of all four boys on it so you can all see my little furry Angels. Hopefully i will have time to do that this evening!

[dandysmom]

I do look forward to those pics, JB! Bless them for helping you at this sad time.

[JBalways2000]

Hi all

Just wanted to update because after looking for the perfect locket for over 2 weeks, i found one that seems almost too good to be true. i had been set on getting a white gold one, but i changed my mind after thinking about it because all the jewellery that i do wear is silver, and as i plan to never take this locket off, i thought it better to get the locket in silver too.

I saw a few different ones that i liked, but as soon as i saw this one a couple of nights ago i knew it was the one. I found it on ebay and after asking the seller a couple of questions, i have bought it today. here is the link for anyone interested, and i will of course update once i receive it:

http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=350315304704&ssPageName=STRK:MEWAX:IT

As they add the engraving themselves it will be a couple of weeks before it get it. I have asked them to put just one larger paw print on the front, rather than the three that are shown in the photo. I will also be getting Raven's name on the back. As it holds four photos i am thinking about putting a piccie of each of my boys in it, but i shall see what i think once it arrives.

I will be getting a longer length chain for it, but other then that i think it is pretty perfect and im hoping it will be easy enough to put his fur into. again, once i have the locket i will let you all know how i get on with it.

I do promise to make a thread with photos of my boys in soon, they really are my Angels. Raven's brothers have been little heroes to us these last few weeks and have been one of the only things keeping us going. We owe them so much :smt049

[dandysmom]

That looks lovely, just what you were looking for!

[tabsie]

Hi, hope you are feeling a little better, sorry it's taken ages but I have had problems with my camera. I've just posted some photos of my locket. The fur seems secure with the plastic over it, i've tried to show the plastic on one of the photos. Have you got your locket yet?

[JBalways2000]

Hi, hope you are feeling a little better, sorry it's taken ages but I have had problems with my camera. I've just posted some photos of my locket. The fur seems secure with the plastic over it, i've tried to show the plastic on one of the photos. Have you got your locket yet?

Thankyou for posting photos, i have just replied in your thread-your locket is gorgeous and im so glad you are pleased with it and that your darling girl's fur is secure(she is gorgeous btw!).

Unfortunately still no sign of my locket, but the seller did say it can take 17 working days so i knew i had to be patient. I really hope it turns up soon though. The canvas we had done with my fave piccie of Raven did come back last week though and it is gorgeous, i am so pleased with it. We are just unsure of how to hang it because it didnt come with any fixings so we have to figure that out and then it will be up.

To be honest day to day is getting easier because we know we have to do things, but im missing him more every day :cry: im still in alot of pain and my heart aches every time i look at a photo of him, but my boys are getting me through because hes living inside of them. Its been four weeks tonight since he fell asleep:cry: it feels like just yesterday:cry:

Im sure you are probably feeling pretty much the same way i am-the days become more normal without them but you never stop thinking about them do you? We washed the throws from the sofa and our bed throw for the first time today since he left us-obviously the throws usually get washed much more often! we just didnt want to wash anything he had touched:cry: We just keep telling ourselves that Raven and the others loved to get onto nice clean blankets and dirty up the nice clean floor, so thats what is making us do the hard things. i still cant bring myself to clean all the nose smudges off the windows just yet though, one day at a time.

We have been distracting ourselves by thoroughly spoiling the boys the last week or so! have got them lots of new toys and things that we had put off getting them for too long-lucky we have a credit card!:oops: I shall have to get some piccies of them with their new toys to put up here-i did promise to put some up of the boys already:oops: and i got some lovely ones of them, but i wont be posting any piccies of them without including some of Raven, so i just need to have the strengh to put some on of Raven too. Il try and make sure its soon.

As soon as i have the locket i shall update and post a piccie of it too. fingers crossed im not waiting too much longer.

[tabsie]

Thankyou for posting photos, i have just replied in your thread-your locket is gorgeous and im so glad you are pleased with it and that your darling girl's fur is secure(she is gorgeous btw!).

Unfortunately still no sign of my locket, but the seller did say it can take 17 working days so i knew i had to be patient. I really hope it turns up soon though. The canvas we had done with my fave piccie of Raven did come back last week though and it is gorgeous, i am so pleased with it. We are just unsure of how to hang it because it didnt come with any fixings so we have to figure that out and then it will be up.

To be honest day to day is getting easier because we know we have to do things, but im missing him more every day :cry: im still in alot of pain and my heart aches every time i look at a photo of him, but my boys are getting me through because hes living inside of them. Its been four weeks tonight since he fell asleep:cry: it feels like just yesterday:cry:

Im sure you are probably feeling pretty much the same way i am-the days become more normal without them but you never stop thinking about them do you? We washed the throws from the sofa and our bed throw for the first time today since he left us-obviously the throws usually get washed much more often! we just didnt want to wash anything he had touched:cry: We just keep telling ourselves that Raven and the others loved to get onto nice clean blankets and dirty up the nice clean floor, so thats what is making us do the hard things. i still cant bring myself to clean all the nose smudges off the windows just yet though, one day at a time.

We have been distracting ourselves by thoroughly spoiling the boys the last week or so! have got them lots of new toys and things that we had put off getting them for too long-lucky we have a credit card!:oops: I shall have to get some piccies of them with their new toys to put up here-i did promise to put some up of the boys already:oops: and i got some lovely ones of them, but i wont be posting any piccies of them without including some of Raven, so i just need to have the strengh to put some on of Raven too. Il try and make sure its soon.

As soon as i have the locket i shall update and post a piccie of it too. fingers crossed im not waiting too much longer.

It is so hard is'nt it, it's been just over 5 weeks since I lost Tabitha and I miss her more than ever, I still cry everyday. All I can say is it is easier to get on with normal life than it was at the start, but inside the pain is still as bad. I'm glad you like your canvas, it's things like that and our lockets that help give a little comfort. I already have a canvas of Tabitha that I have had for a couple of years, that I love, so I ordered a cushion to put on my bed with her picture on, which came a couple of days ago and it is lovely, the picture is so clear, it could almost be her sat on my bed. I look forward to seeing how your locket turns out, and seeing pictures of Raven and all of your other pets x