little bully

[glyn]

I have 2 british blues, Molly and Ralph both from the same family but 2 years appart. female 3 years and male 1, both neutered.
Molly lead a very contented life as a house cat, allowed in the back garden in the evenings but my wife and i decided to get her some company as we both work during the day.

Allong came Ralph.

He is a very affectionate cat and 90% of the time everythings great. The problem is if he see's Molly getting attention from me or my wife he will sneak up on her when nobodys watching and attack her. he also attacks her at night or when were out.
This is really starting to effect Mollys well being she has become distant and nervous.
we dont want to get rid of Ralph as we love them both but cant let it continue, what can we do?

[angieh]

Sorry to hear about Ralph, Glyn. He does sound like a typical bully boy. I have little experience of this behaviour, but I am sure other members who have will be along shortly.

[dinahsmum]

What a bad guy! Poor Molly.
Maybe it his age - he is a grumpy selfish teenager etc?
Someone will have had a similar experience and be able to offer concrete suggestions, I'm sure.
Nice to have you on Catsey!

[dandysmom]

I've had no experience of this either; can only think of the two standard recommendations of a Feliway plug to emit soothing pheromones and some Bachs remedy in the water... poor Molly, this must be so distressing for her......

[Elaine]

Poor Molly, I am sure my Bernie will sympathise with her greatly. I have Eva the Diva, who is quite a character and a bully towards Bernie. Fortunately Bernie is a very laud back dude. Our affections became somewhat divided as Bernie will seek cuddles from my o/h while the Diva OWNS me:shock: :lol: . It can be quite upsetting sometimes though when she just wont let him settle.
Sometimes it can help to try to create more territory for them by adding some hiding places and/or shelves or something that they can get onto. Cat activity centres can also help.
This link may be able to help. Wizz is a lovely woman and you can contact her for advice too.
http://www.wizz-catz.co.uk/introducing.html

[glyn]

thanks for your advice, were going to try them on Feliway.

i'll let you know how it goes.

[dandysmom]

Please do come back with any news, Glyn; and I forgot to say welcome to Catsey!

[glyn]

Well weve been using the Feliway plug-in for 2 days and theres been no major bust-ups so far.

They're always better on the weekends because were at home most of the day and they get worn out following us around so the major test comes next week.

I must say they though that they both seem very chilled out, in fact they almost look stoned;
:cool: like the comedown from catnip.

[dandysmom]

Sounds encouraging, Glyn; would you say it was better than the usual weekend? Did you try the Bachs also? Do,let us know if it's better this week.....

[glyn]

Well its been a few weeks since i asked for advice and i think i owe you guys an update.

Weve been using a felliway plug-in for three weeks or so now and, whether its due to the plug-in or not they are a lot happier.

It seems as though proving how tough he is is no longer Ralph's number 1 priority, in fact Molly has been taking pleasure in ambushing him as he walks through the curtains again, somthing she hasn't done for a while.

They still chase each other around occasionally which is perfectly normal, but Molly is a lot more confident now.

You'll be pleased to hear that Molly is a lot happier, shes having a knap in the clean laundry basket at the moment but shes been getting a lot of strokes lately.
She's slept on my feet whilst im in bed a few times (at least till i've gone to sleep) and shes been running to greet me when i come home from work.

One thing weve been very aware of is neglecting Ralph, if he sees or hears Molly getting attention you can hear him grumble and running from a mile away - he seems to have the hearing of a bat when it suits him.
Weve been carefull to make sure that they both get treated evenly (whilst letting them both think there being spoilt) and they almost seem to be enjoying eachothers company..... almost.

[dandysmom]

Thanks for the update; sounds very encouraging! The Feliway seems to have helped. They may never be best buddies, but at least the aggression is much less and your household sounds much more peaceful!!

[dinahsmum]

Good news!
Thanks for the update

[angieh]

Thanks for the update Glyn! So glad Mollie and Ralph are sorting out their differences and that Mollie seems happier. What good news - bet you're relieved!

[Mags]

Great news Glyn, long may it continue :D

[Kay]

So glad that this has worked out. Everything sounds like it should be.