Not sure what to do, any help appreciated.

[RRR]

Unfortunately our ginger tom Zoot was knocked over on Wednesday and killed He has left his sister Lexi behind who is now on her own. We are really unsure what to do, whether to get Lexi a new friend or not.

The thought of getting another cat at the moment is very hard but on the other hand I really dont want Lexi to feel too lonely. She's not herself at the moment at all so I know Zoot's death has affected her.

Lexi will be two tomorrow so very young still and I dont really want her to live the rest of her life on her own. We do have lovely next door neighbours who have two cats that Lexi gets on well with but that doesn't help when she's snuggled up indoors on her own. Her and Zoot used to always sleep together.

We are completely devastated about losing Zoot so thinking about getting another cat just doesnt seem right at the moment but I dont want Lexi to suffer because we are so upset, iykwim.

But on the other hand during the summer we rescued two kittens (they were found at my partner's work yard, they had been dumped and were extremely malnourished) that we had for a few weeks before they went onto their new home fit and healthy. Lexi did not appreciate having the kittens in the house and would hiss at them whenever she was close to them, she even stopped coming indoors as much as usual. So we're not sure if she would take to another cat in her home. But she does get on well with the neighbours cats.

So basically (sorry about the long post) we aren't sure what to do for the best, anyone else been in this position?

Thank you all x

[angieh]

I am sorry not to be able to offer much advice on how to help Lexi, although I do sympathise with your loss. You yourself have said that you think it is too early to consider getting another cat.

I wonder whether Lexi would take to another male of a similar age to herself? Unfortunately I have no experience of introducing cats in these circumstances and hope someone else may be along soon who can advise.

[Kazz]

Sorry to hear about your loss.I have never introduced a cat to a resident cat so I am no use in this but what do you feel.....?I imagine that introducing any newcomer to a resdent cat could take time.......

[dandysmom]

In my quite limited experience , perhaps a young male neuter might be more acceptable. I made the mistake of rehoming an adult female. Patches, when Sultan died, and Misty was noticeably grieving for him...that was a mistake, as they never got along...simply tolerated one another. When I added the little male, the social dynamics were much better...Misty loved him, Patches tolerated him, and the tension between Misty and Patches was much lessened. But I'd suggest if you're going to do it, don't wait too long, as your girl may adjust well to being an only cat, and very much resent an intruder... that's why Leia is an only cat .

[kado]

All our cats where at a loss when we lost our kay to a RTA on may 12th this year. They just sat in a circle around there food which they never did before. It was so quiet it was not the same without her she was 2 and the boss of them all. We got 2 kittens on the 14th of may, mainly for the other cats and also my girls who where devisated. Kado execpted them straight away. Guinness was next followed by Simon after about a month. They are all males and get along. They where so tiny when we got them we kept them in the carrier some of the time. At night we kept them in the kitchen where they ran free all night. Only you know when the time is right for a cat/kitten. Maybe if you visited a rehoming center and asked them if you could bring lexi to see if they get along before you take one home.

jane X

[seasidechris]

Perhaps if you feel it is too soon,then Lexi does too? Time is needed to grieve and get used to the new situation you are all in. It's all very sad and strange at the moment. When you have come to terms with this space in your lives, this loss, then bring a new furry friend into the space, and they will be welcomed with love and open arms (and furry paws) So sorry to hear of Zoot's death. I lost my ginger cat Wally in the same way a few years ago. A lovely soul gone without warning. My thoughts with you,
Chris xx

[RRR]

Thanks everyone for your replies, it helps so much to have other peoples opinions.

I guess in the long run we definitely need to have a friend for Lexi, I was also thinking of an adult male already neutered. I'm not sure where we stand with a rescue centre though as we have a 13 week old puppy and a year old son. Its definitely something I will look into though.

So does everyone think that it wouldn't be fair on Lexi if we didnt get her another friend, I think thats my main worry, that if we didnt get her a friend then we would be doing more harm, iykwim.

[dandysmom]

Originally Posted by RRR

Thanks everyone for your replies, it helps so much to have other peoples opinions.

I guess in the long run we definitely need to have a friend for Lexi, I was also thinking of an adult male already neutered. I'm not sure where we stand with a rescue centre though as we have a 13 week old puppy and a year old son. Its definitely something I will look into though.

So does everyone think that it wouldn't be fair on Lexi if we didnt get her another friend, I think thats my main worry, that if we didnt get her a friend then we would be doing more harm, iykwim.

Impossible to answer; depends on your cat. Some would be happy to have a companion, some prefer being an only cat. I personally think two are better...but it's really up to Lexi!

[kado]

You would not be doing harm to Lexi if you didnt get another cat.

jane

[dandysmom]

Jane's right. Misty didn't want "another cat", she wanted her Sultan back!